Why do this?

What you see below was written five years ago. Today I update this from my apartment in Israel in my 4th year abroad. I no longer feel hopeless and full of despair but am still in need of daily doses of gratitude. As 2020 began to fade my spirit felt a bit musty, like a favorite shirt that has lived in a drawer too long--not moldy or mothy yet, but on its way. All it needs is a good wash, some fabric softener and some attention and my favorite shirt is back!

There is no better fabric softener for the soul than gratitude!

The last few years I have been plagued by despair, self-pity and hopelessness. I kept fighting, doing the work to get myself out of the hole I was in and praying like crazy.

Finally, in the last few months, I was relieved of the hopelessness. I suddenly didn't go into great despair whenever I got frustrated.

Then, only a few days ago, I suddenly found myself very interested in living MY life. I was learning something from every encounter. I was no longer obsessed with trying to figure out what is wrong with me or what I'm doing wrong in this life.

I am no longer in survival mode!

Does anybody actually LIVE here? It's awesome! Suddenly I have tons of time on my hands; I feel motivated to achieve; I am fearless.

The joy I am experiencing at this new freedom is immeasurable and words are not working to explain it. The best I can do if share how grateful I am for each day.

I started posting on Facebook each day of this year, but then decided to commit to do this EVERY day this year.

Here we go...